Ok, to start of its best that you know i dated this girl for 2 and a half years which ended about 6 months ago, i'll try & sum up how the relationship was & how it went wrong.
First off the relationship was fine she is a very special type of girl, not an easy shag, doesn't cheat but can be very clingy & tries to boss you around, this is where the problems started.
I admitt after about 6 months, i started to treat her a bit rough as she wouldn't trust me going out with my friends or drinking without her & was yearning for some freedom so i actually threatened to dump her if she didnt back off, she did back off as she was bessotted by me, i carried on tacking her for granted as i knew she couldn't leave me this is were it backfired.
She made a new friend (Male) & i didnt think nothing of it for months & months until i clocked on that she wasn't being as needy, it was like she gained confidence & didn't need to see me as much then i started wanting to see her more & aquising her of cheating ect ect, then the tables had turned she loved the freedom going out drinking, leaving me regretting how i treated her & missing what i had.
Then the main thing which she did which ended the relationship which was sinking anyway due to her not stopping seeing this male friend & even going away with him for a weekend was when she turned up to my flat (I live with my mom), drunk claiming my mom dont like her ect ect, & then tried to fight with my mom.
We split but recently she wants to get back with me & she picked perfect timing as i just split from another girl who cheated on me, so i was feeling low, i met up with her we slept together, but all the old feelings were coming back & she was really lovely, but the problem is i feel as if i could be doing the wrong thing as my family all hate her (as they think she cheated, & hit my mom), plus she did put me through hell & back when she was treating me terribly, but the thing is nobody knows her like i do, she is the only girl i feel secure with & shes so cute & sweet & we have been through so much together, also we have alot in common, but if i did get back with her all my family & friends will be livid.
Good points to my ex: Caring Sexy Cute Nice feet (lets me touch them) alot in common trustworthy very open & honest i know what im getting with her i know her inside out
Bad points: Loud gets rowdy when drinks very arguementetive has weird things such as starts an arguement if i look at nude seens on t.v (so anytime we watch movies ect it starts an arguement) very jealous shes a handfull is bossy (dont like me being with friends much) is embarrassing sometimes as she can be loud family dont like her
Please give me your opinion on this, im really confused, im meeting up with her saturday & would like to be more level headed, thanks guys Posted by Tom Uz (Member # 12166) on :
"To err is human, to forgive is divine", quoth the bard. Maybe. Stories fitting your description some times come to a good end, sometimes bad. You can't expect to change each other or your selfs too much. The path with better odds is to understand and be tolerant. Tolerant of what? Well, that's where the individuals involved have to come to some kind of understanding. You say "open and honest" and "i know what im getting" - I'd say "priceless".
Posted by feetluvr (Member # 1570) on :
To me, she sounds like quite the Dr. Jekyl/ Mr. Hyde personality. And your bad list is as long as your good list. And there's lots of stuff on that "bad list" that's really bad. Personally I think she has LOTS of issues, the worst being her inability to control herself when she's been drinking. Though her good attributes are really nice, as Tom said, you're not going to change her. Personally I'd make a break for it. There's lots of nicer fish in the sea.
Posted by Elvzz (Member # 14178) on :
Sounds like the attributes of her in a vaccuum are fine...but wheh she interacts with others she is not. You have to look within yourself and ask if that is enough for you. Keep her close to you, order in, no friends. Or do you want/need something more?
There is no gun and there is no head - we rite our own ship.
Posted by oscarthemonkey (Member # 1692) on :
Move on, you can do better.
Posted by RPM (Member # 2895) on :
not sure what to tell you. but... you both made errors. if you can face them and fix them.. go for it. if not.. move on!
RPM
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
quote:Originally posted by RPM: not sure what to tell you. but... you both made errors. if you can face them and fix them.. go for it. if not.. move on!
RPM
The difference is im mature enough to admitt mine, she will not she just keeps blaming it on the fact that i treated her bad in the first place.
Posted by bluetoelover (Member # 14736) on :
Go for it. I too was in somewhat the same position as you were. My current girl now(we went out all of high school then broke up for a year and a half)went away to university while I moved to the other side of the country for that year and a half. When we broke up I just decided I had enough of her controlling the relationship. Fast forward to the summer of 06'. We happened to run into each other back in our home town, she was in a relationship where I was just enjoying being single. The more time we spent together the more I realized she had changed and the more I wanted her back. Now my friends picked up on this and were against it from the get go. They knew how she was back in high school. This is where our situations match! Before we decided to "make it official" as in her dumping her current b/f, we had a good long talk about high school and what went wrong. It was in no way just her being the "bad guy" but we decided that the year and a half off was the best thing for us. Now I dont know how long you were split up from your ex but my advice is to just sit down face to face and have a heart to heart about what went wrong and just take things slow instead of just jumping back into the "old relationship", because if you rush then you will surely fall.
Posted by snakebyte (Member # 24022) on :
If you want it, take it. You being happy is all that matters. Her being happy will make you happy too. Life is too short to worry about everything. Seize the day! And remember, it is not like you are suturing yourself together, if down the road, you decide it was a mistake, you can still move on. Taking chances makes life worth living. Good luck!
Posted by ozboy (Member # 518) on :
Take her back but communicate those bad points with her and see if u can reach a happy medium or a degree of compromise.
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
i am going out with her again now is going ok so far, but i feel she may just be using me as she has a flat & is lonely/feeling down, it feels as if we both know we should be brave & let go but at the same time we have enjoyed spending the night together, am so confused
Posted by Toetapper (Member # 6473) on :
I have a degree in psychology but it is a recovering heroine addict that summed it up best by defining insanity as doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.
Seems to me that we've been over this territory before. As I read your list of bad points and thought that YOU should re-read them. It would be helpful to you to notice how many of her behaviors are directed at changing you. Sometimes changing oneself is a good thing but it must be done only if you want to change. In my opinion, she is trying to turn you into someone else by changing your nature, those things about you that define you. This will only breed resentment on your part and, to compound the problem, she will never be satisfied with any change you make...it simply won't be enough.
There are women in my life who only contact me when they want something from me; some have been willing to exchange sex for whatever it is they wanted. This seems to be the case with you. Your family can see this and see very clearly what is going on...who knows you better than your family? Believe me, when you find the right one, they will probably know it before you do; moreover, they will be happy for you.
Geez! I could go on and on. Here's the bottom line. Get her out of your life and be clear with her that it is over (be clear with yourself, as well). Start fresh learn from your mistakes. Remember that not everybody who seems to like you is actually interested in your welfare and may be more concerned with their own.
Should I find you making the same complaints about the same bimbo (perhaps even just a similar one), I may feel the need to engage in some castigation.
Posted by Toetapper (Member # 6473) on :
Let me be clear: It may seem to hurt to do this, now, but DUMP HER! A year or two from now, you will realize that it really didn't hurt...it was just an inconvenience blown way out of proportion.
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
thanks toetapper you really have hit home there, i also think alot of the bad she done to me after i hurt her was due to her resenting me for trying to change her because i admitt i tried to change her alot, like i said she is loud, i tried to make her quieter, she was quite hyper which just doesn't suit me, i was trying to make her into the right type of gf for me, which as i remember just made her very unhappy & depressed, & like i said i think she resented me for it & as you said above even though she changed for me it still wasn't enough, i still treated her badly & took alot of her personality away.
[ February 20, 2008, 07:29 AM: Message edited by: ThisisMe373 ]
Posted by Fate111 (Member # 2627) on :
I concur with toetapper. Obviously, you're talking about the same girl who you ended a relationship with near the end of last year, if memory serves me correct. I do believe many people chimed in back then about how you should just make a clean break and move on when you cited her lackluster behavior and the way she treated you and your relatives. It may take a little bit of doing on your part, but maybe you should go back and read the negative points everyone gave about her originally in the post that you started last year about her. I may be wrong, but I still think you can find it in the forum and it hasn't fallen into oblivion yet. This may help you step back a little from the situation, which I think you need to do, because it sounds like you're trying to justify continuing the relationship, which is similar to what you did when you first posted about her here. Granted, what you have with her is familiar and you know her. However, at what cost is staying with her worth to you? You and your family will still be subjected to her bad behavior and you'll ultimately feel terrible in the process. That's really not what a good and loving relationship is all about.
As said before in the original thread about this girl, there are plenty of women out there. It may take some work on your part to find one who is compatible with you but nothing in life worth going after is easy. Don't settle for a relationship you're going to ultimately end up being unhappy with just because you're familiar with the person you're with and it feels "comfortable". It's not worth it if the relationship is aggravating or causes you more pain in the long run.
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
Update on this situation: We were sort of seeing each other but is like a secret relationship as none of my family want me to get back with her for obvious reasons & basically it isn't working out.
We ain't really bothered about seeing each other we only do about once a week, but the problem is i feel if i lose her i wont meet someone else as im not open about my fetish & never want to be as i be ridiculed by my friends & family, & if i get with another girl who's expierienced she'll think im wierd & dump me if i struggle to get aroused as soon as she gets naked, i dont want to be lonely, please help!
Posted by Fate111 (Member # 2627) on :
It sounds like your mind is working overtime in this situation. You're assuming that certain things will happen if you make a clean break from your ex and start dating other women.
I do understand about wanting to keep your liking of women's feet private and away from friends and family. That's all well and good because that's something that you choose to keep private. However, what proof do you have that the next woman you're with will "dump" you and think you're "weird" because you like her feet and they turn you on?
The answer to that question is that you don't have proof. I find that, more often than not, we'll develop scenarios in our heads which, when it comes down to push and shove, have no basis in reality. You're creating all of these "what if" scenarios in your mind that, in the present, and probably in the future, don't, and won't, even exist.
I understand that it may be scary to let go of what you know because, with your ex, it's something you're used to and you're comfortable with. However, you can't let what you had with her rule your thinking. You have to move on and, in due time, try and meet other women.
Chances are, the first few women you may meet and be interested in may not be your type anyway and, hopefully, you'll find that out before things get too deep into it. I'm thinking you probably learned the type of behavior that is completely unacceptable to you from your ex so take that experience and make sure that never happens to you again.
It's okay for guys to be selective when it comes to meeting women. There's no need to be, or feel, desperate. The more desperate you're feeling and acting, the more you'll scare women off and make them run in the other direction anyway. If your liking of women's feet is bothering you, then you need to focus on the things about you that are positive. I once heard that it's best to accentuate the positives and don't even mention the negatives. That is probably what you should start doing. After awhile, the negatives begin to matter less, since the positives become stronger.
Posted by Mighty Mike (Member # 1922) on :
is bossy (dont like me being with friends much) is embarrassing sometimes as she can be loud family dont like her
these are deal breakers for me especially the family not liking her
if you're close with your parents at all, listen to them because THEY KNOW
Posted by YZF-R6 (Member # 1682) on :
quote:Originally posted by ThisisMe373: my family all hate her (as they think she cheated, & hit my mom )
Dude, WTF ? If you're even considering of letting this slide, then by all means, go ahead - you two deserve eachother. How old are you anyway ?
Posted by Mighty Mike (Member # 1922) on :
yeah seriously
they say chicks like bad boys, clearly many guys like bad girls
Posted by Toetapper (Member # 6473) on :
I promised some castigation but it's late and I've got some other things on my agenda which require my attention so I'll be brief, even terse:
You Dope! You are so busy imagining all the terrible outcomes you might have without this hosebag that you have overlooked the more grim possibilities by staying with her!
I would advise that you check to see who is walking around with your balls...smart money would wager on her. How has she got you believing that you can't "get it up" with anyone but her?
You confuse "lonely" with being "alone". There' a big difference.
Enough said. Give this some genuine thought.
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
to answer above questions im 21, & she's not a leo she's a saggiterious.
Im really trying to let go & move on & think its going well, im pumping weights, mixing with friends & going out alot.
Its just she's always at the back of my mind, the situation atm is basically we see each other about every 2 weeks & keep having the same discussion that its not working trying to resolve it & end up making ourselves belive it can work & just wont make a clean break its really stupid.
We really aint meant for each other, she's loud im laid back, she's very energetic & im more a chilled out kinda guy, she drains me when im with her & look forward to our next 2 week break from her, the only thing i enjoy is the sex & cuddling up as im lonely.
She's like a security blanket to me, its like im assured in my head that i got someone and am not totally alone, & when i lost her the reality just hit me that im alone.
I know im pretty much answering my own questions & we should obviously split, but its not easy to just let her go & id hate to see her with a new bf while im still lonely jacking off at home while some guy has got my ex to fuck.
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
.
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
iv had a bad week havent seen her all week but id jump at the chance if she calls as im feeling very lonely & down, i feel if i let her go i wont ever settle down with another girl as im rubbish in bed as its harder to get aroused as i have a fetish & tbh i am not the best socielly, anybody help me
Posted by LovelyLadies (Member # 5079) on :
Wow bro, your almost in same situation I find myself in, constantly. LoL.
Posted by Ninja of the Foot Clan (Member # 25128) on :
my thoughts;
it sucks to know an ex that you care about is with another person, it really sucks when you know that other person.
life tends to suck, more often than not, it can make you cling to the things that you like, making it even worse when you lose those things.
there is no 'perfect person' but when you find someone and never give thier imperfections a second thought, that is love, for however long it may last.
Posted by jayrea (Member # 28480) on :
from a females point of view: I had to go and read your post a couple times just to make sure I was reading it correctly. It seems as though you are playing with emotions in some areas of your relationship. You stated that you hated the fact she was so clingy with you, and you couldn't even go out with your friends and wanted you freedom. You started to treat her badly and threatened to break up with her. but when she did start going out and not depending on you, you got upset and wanted her around. She accused you of cheating, you accused her of cheating. Now not taking sides in this post, it is obvious you both have trust issues with each other. I think you both like the idea of a relationship with each other, but you two obviously are searching for other qualities that are not present. I like to call this being addicted to each other. You long for when they aren't around but when they do come along the honeymoon only last a few weeks before the tidle wave of emotions starts. The fact that she has been verbally abuseive to your family makes we wonder why you would even want that negativity in your life. Unless you enjoy the rollercoaster of emotions you both present to each other, i would say cut ties and move on to save you both alot of resentment and confusion to each other.
Posted by Elvzz (Member # 14178) on :
Sounds like you are opposites and perhaps that is what attracted you to each other, but you realize that it is not working anymore -
No one can complete you - sounds like you only miss her when you are in a negative, vulnerable state. Easier to say than to do, but keep going out and working on yourself. And perhaps when you are in a positive vulnerable state, like sharing feelings/dreams with a woman at a party or so - that will be something worth wanting again.
Why do you keep having the same conversations/complaints? One of you, if it is going to work, has to make the first move/behavior change.
Knowing something does not matter much - it is the actions you take congruent to that knowledge that will make a difference/the difference.
Just my 3 cents -
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
thanks for replies, update on this situation, i havent heard from her for about a week & half apparently she's lost her mobile, but she knows my number of her head & could obviously find a way of contacting me its just an excuse not to see me & keep stringing me along, i let her do this as i feel lonely & feel i wont meet someone else,we obviously dont get along as we both always come out with excuses not to see each other but just want to keep the option, i need to become more independent, maybe its not helping because im stressing big time over money as i have alot of pressures atm such as my car MOT running out soon & i havent got any money & i never want to lose my car, i feel id be more confident if i was financially secure, this could be a blessing in disguise her losing her mobile as i cant call her (i would of by now). Replies & Opinions Welcome Posted by footgirl0226 (Member # 29201) on :
Here is a chicks 2 cents worth:
We all require a lot of attention. We all get needy. We all need reassurance we are "the one" and "the love of your life" etc... Why? Cause we have breasts, vaginas and hormones. Plain and simple. The balance is this-- A woman can find the balance and not go overboard. A child hasnt learned yet. How old are you two? Seriously, if you say early 20's -- I would blame most of this on age and stupidity.
With that said, it is NEVER acceptable to disrespect your mother. SHE HIT HER? Come on...
You have had 2 girls in a row cheat on you, and your confidence is low. Get back out there and stop looking at the past and what "could be" You cant change anyone except yourself.
But - I do stand by the fact that chicks are emotional - but some of us WORTH THE FIGHT and EFFORT
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
quote:Originally posted by footgirl0226: Here is a chicks 2 cents worth:
We all require a lot of attention. We all get needy. We all need reassurance we are "the one" and "the love of your life" etc... Why? Cause we have breasts, vaginas and hormones. Plain and simple. The balance is this-- A woman can find the balance and not go overboard. A child hasnt learned yet. How old are you two? Seriously, if you say early 20's -- I would blame most of this on age and stupidity.
With that said, it is NEVER acceptable to disrespect your mother. SHE HIT HER? Come on...
You have had 2 girls in a row cheat on you, and your confidence is low. Get back out there and stop looking at the past and what "could be" You cant change anyone except yourself.
But - I do stand by the fact that chicks are emotional - but some of us WORTH THE FIGHT and EFFORT
Im 21 & she is 19, the thing is we are simular in loads of other ways, we are both saggiterious's, its hard to let go, i had an opputunity with another girl recently but i felt nervous & not ready she was sitting on my crotch area in her pyjamas rubbing her ass on me but i wasn't getting aroused, i just wish i never had this fetish & id be more confident to move on with other girls as i could just shag them np, instead of being attracted to feet
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
opinions on last post please.
Posted by Sir Mike (Member # 1922) on :
let her go, how do you look at yourself in the mirror after being with a girl that hit your mom?
and who cares that you are both sagitarrius' why do people care about that shit?
the things guys do for women,talk about thinking with the wrong head Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
just wish i never had this fetish, it can make sex awkward as the pussy just dont really do nothin for me, can therapy help this kinda stuff or is it a waste of money?
Posted by Sir Mike (Member # 1922) on :
you don't like pussy?
juts go out and meet another girl with nice feet
Posted by footgirl0226 (Member # 29201) on :
quote:Originally posted by ThisisMe373: opinions on last post please.
Here is my opinion - it seems as though there are a few I have noticed on this site that focus so much on the foot thing being a negative instead of a POSITIVE.
You cant even think of pussy cause you are focusing on feet 1000% of the time.
Lord, I think at this point I love pussy more than you and I am not a les!
lol
Posted by Fate111 (Member # 2627) on :
Originally posted by footgirl0226:
quote: Here is my opinion - it seems as though there are a few I have noticed on this site that focus so much on the foot thing being a negative instead of a POSITIVE.
Great point, footgirl! Negative thoughts get a person nowhere.
There's nothing wrong with liking a woman's feet and there's no reason to feel guilty about it or feel like you're some kind of freak because you do. Negative thinking like this, as well as in any other situation, will only inhibit you. The more you can get comfortable with yourself and with your attraction to women's feet, the better off you'll be.
I used to feel like a freak and guilty because of my female foot attraction. Then, I realized that there are some women who, at the very least, don't mind it if a guy that they're romantically involved with and are comfortable being around happens to like their feet and think they're sexy. This revelation was further reinforced when I began having foot encounters with women who were just friends and we weren't involved romantically.
One very important lesson that I've learned since that revelation is that you can't control what others think. You can't control what they think about you or your preferences and, as such, it's a huge waste of time and energy to worry about the "what ifs" when it comes to that. Because you can't control it, who cares what others think? They're not you. They may have their thoughts, opinions, etc., but, guess what? You can't change them so don't bother wasting time worrying about other people and what they may think or what may potentially happen in a situation that, as of yet, doesn't even exist.
If you start seeing a girl and she doesn't go along with you liking her feet, then just say, "Next!" and move on. It doesn't matter what she may think about you because it's not like you can change it or control it. Unless she's absolutely mortified when it comes to her feet, or feet in general, odds are that a woman who has feelings for a guy won't mind foot related activities because they will, in most cases, be a new and unique experience for her, compared to the average guys who are more into T&A.
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
quote:Originally posted by footgirl0226:
quote:Originally posted by ThisisMe373: opinions on last post please.
Here is my opinion - it seems as though there are a few I have noticed on this site that focus so much on the foot thing being a negative instead of a POSITIVE.
You cant even think of pussy cause you are focusing on feet 1000% of the time.
Lord, I think at this point I love pussy more than you and I am not a les!
lol
How can i learn to think of the pussy more? Its like the more i try ignore feet & go for the normal stuff like ass, tits, pussy the more i yearn for feet?
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sir Mike: you don't like pussy?
juts go out and meet another girl with nice feet
I like pussy when my dicks in it feels good, but fingering a girl does nothing for me & licking her out is quite nasty tbh, is there anyway i could learn to like it more?
Posted by Sir Mike (Member # 1922) on :
quote:Originally posted by ThisisMe373:
quote:Originally posted by Sir Mike: you don't like pussy?
juts go out and meet another girl with nice feet
I like pussy when my dicks in it feels good, but fingering a girl does nothing for me & licking her out is quite nasty tbh, is there anyway i could learn to like it more?
i don't think that's totally out of the ordinary, many guys don't like eating pussy
Posted by footgirl0226 (Member # 29201) on :
[/qb][/QUOTE]i don't think that's totally out of the ordinary, many guys don't like eating pussy [/QB][/QUOTE]
Oh hell no. Mike do you fit into this category? Posted by blackHxC88 (Member # 15094) on :
reading this entire thread, I SHOULD be happy i'm not in a relationship. common sense really, i wouldn't kicked her to the curb once she got into it with my folks. no matter how nice her feet are or anything.
Posted by Toetapper (Member # 6473) on :
As I have often mentioned here, women are more than just their feet.
I think, ThisisMe373, that you aren't even remotely in love with her; you are in love only with her feet. The reason her pussy doesn't arouse you is because SHE doesn't arouse you, your focus is strictly on her feet because there is nothing else about her that genuinely appeals to you.
Though you are 21 years of age, the hangover of adolescence hasn't completely cleared and you still suffer from that terrible feeling that there will never be another one like her, and if you're lucky, you won't find one like her again. Think about it, there are some 5-6 BILLION people on the face of the Earth, you can't help but do better.
Sadly, it's the nature of being human (and male) that this wound heals slowly and your thoughts will suddenly turn to her - with a bitter sting - often. Just like an exercise regimen, though, give it 6 weeks and you will start to see results: you will notice that you think of her less. At 6 months, you'll notice that you are actually having large portions of the day when nothing really reminds you of her. You may never escape the memory of her completely but what remains fond, on one hand, and cautionary on the other.
Finally, when you find the "right one", you'll know because it won't be just her feet that revs your engine, not just her pussy, either; you'll have a great potential candidate when the thought of her breathless voice, the taste of her sweat, or the gracefulness of her hands affect you. Certainly, feet may have a very fundamental appeal but it is the woman to whom they are attached that truly makes them alluring.
Oh, one last thing: dump the astrology crap. There's no truth in it, at all. Time to think for yourself.
Note to Sir Mike: The pleasure you should derive from fingering and licking is seeing how much pleasure your partner has from it. The better you get at it, the more you will like it. Granted, it may be an "acquired taste" but I'll bet learning to give a BJ is, too.
Posted by Sir Mike (Member # 1922) on :
great post i agree with everything
footgurl - i don't hate it, i just prefer her to focus on me Posted by RPM (Member # 2895) on :
toetapper... good post!
Posted by Footvasian (Member # 29721) on :
Bravo ToeTapper. I am in total agreeance with you. Great post!
I do believe in the astrology tho... It has rang true time and time again for me so I am purely basing this on personal experience.
The key to a successful partnership is to fulfill each others needs. One shouldn't take precedence over the other. Mutual satisfaction is key... I'm all for pleasing my man but it's great to have that reciprocated also...
Plus you are too young... Still wet behind the ears, so to say... No offense, just reality. Good luck.
~FV
Posted by shadixx (Member # 22316) on :
Loud gets rowdy when drinks very arguementetive has weird things such as starts an arguement if i look at nude seens on t.v (so anytime we watch movies ect it starts an arguement) very jealous shes a handfull is bossy (dont like me being with friends much) is embarrassing sometimes as she can be loud family dont like her
Those are some pretty strong bad points there. When it comes to women,I have been around the block a time or 2. Take it from me,she isnt someone that you want to get tied down to.No matter what you feel now,give it 3 months of having your own freedom and doing what you want to do and flirting with other girls and you will forget all about her. All of those points that you described,descibes my EX pretty much perfectly. So,a word of advice..things may be good for awhile,but all of those bad points,which are quite serious,will start to wear on you and take its toll and eventually you will begin to despise her and things will go sour. So save your self the torment and heartache,because brother,there are millions of other girls out there.
Posted by loves licking feet (Member # 12096) on :
ThisIsMe373......I understand , been there , done that ...... when it comes down to it , its better to move on instead of trying 'repair' problems .... you might be able to stay friends with bennifets but just be careful....
its happened to me
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
thanks for all the advice iv broken away from her not completely yet as she wont listen that i want to split but im dating another girl now she's not as attractive as her but way nicer personality, im just worried when it will come to sex i'll fail to rise to the occasion as im never gonna let my fetish be known, trust me in the uk its not known & my family & friends would be freaked, i suppose i need to be comfortable with her & everything should be ok.
Posted by Toetapper (Member # 6473) on :
Honest, you don't want to start down the path of "Performance Anxiety"; the more you think about your performance and/or erection, the worse you will make it. Stop thinking about it and just let it happen...and, yes it is that easy. Just do what you do & enjoy and, fer cryin' out loud, don't analyze it while it's happening.
You mention that your new girl isn't as "attractive" as the last one; I take it that you mean she isn't as pretty, or with equal physical charms. Give it some time, there is something amazing built into human beings: as person "A" gets to know person "B", the attractiveness (and even physical beauty) of "B" will increase remarkably in the perception of "A". I'm not just talking about sexual attraction. You may recall meeting a school buddy's mother for the first time and she was a little off-putting at first; with time, not only did you discover that she was a nice lady but you no longer saw that big mole under her eye (or something like that). Similarly, I'll bet your ex ain't all that you saw in her and the new, nicer, girl will start looking pretty good as you become better acquainted.
As for concealing your foot fetish in perpetuity, why does your family have to know about the intimate details of your sexual desires? How does this involve your friends? This is strictly between you and the woman whose feet you desire, I think. I recognize that there may be some cultural differences between the U.K. and the U.S. but I can't imagine that there is some custom that puts your parents in the audience of your bedroom's theater to raise scorecards judging your performance and the kind of activities that get you or your partner off.
You are right, you need to be comfortable with her, and she with you. Certainly, introducing yourself as a fetishist is not really getting of on the right foot (oh, stop me now, I'm too funny!) in a relationship, there's time for that.
Start with the general niceties of a relationship. The details can gradually emerge later.
As always, gone on too long, I'll shut up, now.
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
Cheers toetapper very helpful advice, The thing i meant about parents & friends knowing was that if i let this girl know about my fetish it will leak out eventually & id certianly rather not risk this, it would destroy my social life, im more comfortable just keeping it to myself.
Posted by Fate111 (Member # 2627) on :
quote:Originally posted by ThisisMe373: Cheers toetapper very helpful advice, The thing i meant about parents & friends knowing was that if i let this girl know about my fetish it will leak out eventually & id certianly rather not risk this, it would destroy my social life, im more comfortable just keeping it to myself.
Do you know for certain that this will eventually leak out?
It sounds to me like this is your brain working overtime again. I've had a few girlfriends in my time and none of them went blabbing to anyone else about what happened behind closed doors.
Posted by J.J. (Member # 24686) on :
quote:Originally posted by footgirl0226:
quote:Originally posted by ThisisMe373: opinions on last post please.
Here is my opinion - it seems as though there are a few I have noticed on this site that focus so much on the foot thing being a negative instead of a POSITIVE.
You cant even think of pussy cause you are focusing on feet 1000% of the time.
Lord, I think at this point I love pussy more than you and I am not a les!
lol
I know we had our clashing of opinions in the past but on this one I gotta be 100 percent with you footgirl, footfetish is a POSITIVE thing! It's a gift rather than a curse Thisisme, and if anything it will bring you closer to the pussy you think you have nothing with.
Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
i hoped so J.J i just want to be attracted to the pussy like wanna touch it, lick it ect, is there anyway i know it sounds mad but anyway i can get to want it more?
Posted by Sir Mike (Member # 1922) on :
tony soprano said that if a guy will lick a hole, he will suck a pole Posted by ThisisMe373 (Member # 2340) on :
thanks for all the advice with this, good news is iv totally broken away from her told her very bluntly, now i can start getting over her, hopefully time will heal.
Posted by Tiny Dave (Member # 30771) on :
Well the getting rowdy when she drinks is what ended many of my relation ships and the drinking didnt part any better.
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